You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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