You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize