What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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