The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
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