I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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