just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Randomize
