This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
