just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
not ubering you a puppy
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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