Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
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We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Guess the answer to the last 2 texts right and you'll get a boob shot tonight. Guess wrong and it will be a picture of a used, boogery kleenex.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
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Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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