Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
