Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
