We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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