I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
