Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
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