I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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