if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
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