Pappa wants mamma naked
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
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