I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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