Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
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