I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
