After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?