are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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