Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
