elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...