Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
We need a shit load of segways right now
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Randomize
