Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Randomize
