btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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