life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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