Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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