I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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