somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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