They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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