i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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