butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Randomize
