it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize
