Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
My vagina is officially offended.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
