you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize