i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
