He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize
