we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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