It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize