My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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