you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
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