If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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