I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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