I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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