would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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