you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
