i don't plan on having that self control this summer
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
PANTIES FOUND
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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