I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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